


The Time Between The Disconnect And The Log-In

by Hino



Category: Half Life VR But The AI Is Self Aware
Genre: Gen, Rip to that Gordon man, There's a sentient Gordon AI and he has to backseat his own life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:35:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25418533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hino/pseuds/Hino
Summary: Benry does in fact need to sleep, but when he wakes up after a brief nap, he finds that Gordon isn't where he left him.It's only concerning if you consider he's missing a hand and bleeding out.
Comments: 5
Kudos: 146





	The Time Between The Disconnect And The Log-In

The place they've holed up for the night is, well, in a hole. The ceiling has a chunk of concrete missing, and as the Science Team filter in alongside Benry and the Skeleton that only Gordon can see, they do their best to make themselves comfortable for the night.

Gordon sinks down against the wall and says that he's ending the simulation. A moment later he's laying still against the wall with the partly clotted wrist wound held tightly to his chest. Slow, exhausted breaths leave him in a repetitive rhythm, and it's a sign to the rest of them that yes, this really is the time to sleep.

Contrary to what the Science Team may think, Benry does need to sleep. The Skeleton doesn't stick around, with far more mischief to set up and prepare for their future. After all, Benry is to be the final boss, and he can't set up his encounters if he's with the group, and he cannot lead them to their demise if he is gone for too long.

So with the Skeleton tending to more pressing matters, Benry sinks down in the corner of the room, ignoring the fresh corpse of a Scientist they hadn't been paying attention to when clearing debris, and closes his eyes. He only needs an hour or so to rest in order to function at his peak. Appearing human does take effort after all, even if the group thinks he looks as human as a packet of crisps.

He knows that the way he sleeps is different to the others. Instead of dreams like he would have back in his home plane, or like he knows other humans have, Benry's mind conjures images of the skeletons working away on their nonsense. Some of it will be useful, while other things are just them playing around in a new world, singing in a Sweet Voice that Benry tries not to copy, lest he sing in his sleep and startle someone. Conveying thoughts that aren't his own is a dangerous act, especially with Tommy around to decipher the meaning in the colours.

No songs escape him in the brief time he's unconscious, and as Benry comes back to his body, and to the reality that he's inhabiting, he finds something different. 

Coomer is still asleep where Benry remembers him laying down. Bubby has shifted to lay against the wall, back pressed against the cool brick. As for Tommy, he's curled up in a ball, comfortably snoring away. It's a soft sound, subtle enough that he won't get teased for it, which is good. Tommy doesn't really deserve that, he thinks.

But the space where Gordon had fallen asleep is empty. There's a few bloodstains from his wounds, others left by his HEV suit staining the concrete, but no human or suit occupying the space.

It makes Benry slightly more alert. He hadn't seen or heard anything in his dreams, which meant that Gordon must be around here somewhere, or that his absence wasn't caused by the skeletons. After all, they want Benry to perform his final role and they wouldn't stand for any sort of deviation from the script.

-A script that makes Benry cringe when he thinks of how they're all going to respond.

Benry shakes his head. Now's not the time to be thinking about future encounters. It's not worth anything if he can't find where Gordon is.

Getting to his feet, Benry inspects the room. There's no door in here, not yet at least, and there's no signs of destruction besides what they'd done before going to bed, which means Gordon's gone out through the roof. It's impressive, considering the guy seems to be the most human out of the group, and the hole is a solid ten foot jump upwards.

Of course, a ten foot vertical leap is not a problem for Benry. He simply thinks about becoming weightless and he does, slowly pulling his feet off the ground as he makes sure gravity isn't about to come crashing down on him. Sometimes it likes to do that. When he's sure that he isn't going to plummet back down, he floats upwards, passing through the hole and landing just outside of it.

The skybox has changed, much to his surprise. While the sun never rises or sets while they're running around, now Benry can see the slow crawl of the moon across the sky and the clouds drifting along on the night's cool and crisp breeze.

It takes a moment for Benry to spot him in the gloom, but he's got good eyes. Somehow the orange doesn't stand out like a sore thumb, seated by the edge of the building. Benry approaches casually, stopping just a few feet away.

Gordon is sitting on the rim of the building, swinging his legs idly back and forth. There's a small recess on the roof-side of the rim where Gordon's crowbar is stashed, along with a pistol. The rest of his weapons are somewhere in inventory space, a emptiness that none of them think to question, let alone investigate.

He looks calm, relaxed even, despite the missing limb. It's so unlike him to be anything but uptight and it feels wrong to look at. It almost makes Benry hesitate in approaching.

Almost.

Burying the unease beneath his disinterest, Benry approaches Gordon, putting a foot on the ridge that he's sitting on and leaning down. "Feetman."

Gordon turns, startled. Benry could feel himself grinning, unnaturally sharp teeth on display in some attempt to freak Gordon out or elicit some kind of reaction from the man.

Instead, Gordon smiles at him and gives a small wave with his hand, stump sitting in his lap like there's nothing wrong at all. It's strange to see and Benry raises an eyebrow at him. "Yo uh, what's the deal."

Turning slightly, Gordon pats the space beside Benry's foot, motioning for him to sit down. He doesn't say anything, only smiling as he pats the space with increasing enthusiasm until Benry caves and lowers himself to sit, legs swinging over the edge and hands on his knees. "You're being a bit weird, Feetman."

There's no snappy remark as Benry looks at Gordon. Instead, the man just smiles, a soft laugh shaking his frame yet no sound coming out. It makes Benry tilt his head, the shadow that's cast over his eyes refusing to move. "What, cat got your tongue?"

Shaking his head, Gordon points up towards the sky with his one remaining hand before doing some kind of jerky motion, like a marionette puppet on strings.

Benry blinks in confusion. "You uh, you having a moment there? A freaky science moment?"

Once again Gordon shakes his head. He repeats the motion, pointing upwards and moving like a marionette, except this time he follows it with another motion; making a cross with his arms. Benry watches as Gordon continues his strange game of charades, pointing to his throat and then placing a finger to his lips in an act of silence.

"Is it a movie title?" Benry asks with a grin. Gordon sighs, shoulders dropping. There's a small smile on his mouth as he looks at Benry, weighing something up in his mind as he does.

"-I do believe Gordon is telling you he cannot speak right now."

Coomer's voice is unexpected, but neither Benry nor Gordon jump at it. Instead they turn to watch as the older man approaches. Gordon gives a small wave while Benry looks at Coomer with confusion. "What, blood loss affect his throat."

A laugh leaves Coomer's mouth as he sits beside Benry. "The Player is not logged in," he says. "So, Gordon cannot speak to us. He is, after all, an avatar for the player. A silent protagonist who serves only- Hello Gordon!" The catchphrase interrupts Coomer's speech, making him scowl. Gordon leans across to pat Coomer's knee in comfort. "Thank you, Gordon."

Benry thinks for a moment. "Wait."

Gordon turns to look at him, still smiling. Benry bites his knuckle as he rolls the words around his head. "You're... like us?"

As if that's the switch Gordon needs flicked, he nods and turns fully to Benry, taking the man's free hand in his own. His injured arm flails around, pointing to the sky and then to his mouth, and Benry feels the pieces slot together.

"Someone's controlling you?" he asks with an uncharacteristic tone, absent of the playful drawl and airheaded thoughts. "Is that why..."

Sometimes at night, Benry has noticed that Gordon is calmer than normal, sometimes swaying to a song nobody is singing, or just watching them with a fondness he never shows in the daylight hours. 

He feels like an idiot for not noticing, considering how aware of the script he is.

It's possible that it shows, because Gordon squeezes Benry's hand tightly. He points off into the distance, and Benry turns to see a Skeleton there, observing everything carefully.

"He says you were busy with the Skeletons!" Coomer translates helpfully. Benry can't help but smile.

"Thanks bro," comes the answer as Benry squeezes back, hoping it's conveyed as a comforting action. "S'nice that you're, y'know, kinda cool. Cooler than Feetman. He yells so much. Like, dude, chill out. Eat some Freesh Fries."

Gordon pulls his hand away from Benry, rolling his eyes as he turns to look at Coomer and nods. He makes a talking motion with his hand, lips moving in a silent "yak-yak-yak" as he mocks the Player that takes over his form. 

Coomer laughs. "He does love to talk a lot!"

Benry agrees. "Can't- No silence allowed. Gotta talk- Always talking." He's smiling along with them, and the air feels strange and comfortable despite the fact that this Gordon Freeman sitting between them is not _their_ Gordon Freeman.

This Gordon Freeman is different, and it shows as the moon crawls across the sky in a way it never does when the Other Gordon Freeman is there. This Freeman laughs at Benry's jokes, a wheeze that sounds like a toy being squished. He watches as Benry sings the Sweet Voice, and marvels when Coomer joins in. At some point he even attempts to copy them, although the best he can get is one tiny, translucent orb.

He's also very touchy. He's playing a gentle game of footsies with Benry while his hand rests on Coomer's shoulder, as if trying to ground himself in the touch of the people around him. 

He also loves to listen. Benry says something offhandedly and Coomer launches into a Wikipedia recital that Gordon devotes his full attention to. Benry thinks it's like a child listening to their parent talk about something exciting. There's not a drop of tension in Gordon's body which contrasts their adventures so much, even when they're all in a safe space, or waking up from a night's sleep.

Coomer is the one to ask the question, although Benry's got it waiting on his tongue.  
"Gordon, when the Player is here with us, can you still hear and see what we're doing?"

Gordon nods immediately. His smile is gone and he looks to Benry. He motions to the missing hand and Benry cringes back. "Sorry dude."

There's a sigh as Gordon offers a smile of acceptance, although it doesn't stay there. The foot that's been playing with Benry's withdraws, leaving Gordon with nothing but himself. While Benry isn't great at charades, he doesn't need Coomer to translate what it means when Gordon mimes a closing book.

"We'll still be here afterwards!" Coomer assures, placing his own hand on Gordon's shoulder. "Even when the curtains close!"

"Yeah, We got you." Benry copies the gesture, grip tight on Gordon's suit. "M'not gonna hold it against you. S'just how shit goes here. Games end."

For a moment it looks like Gordon is going to say something when he stops, locking up and becoming rigid, as if someone has poured ice along his spine.

His head turns slowly, as if struggling against something as he looks at Benry.

"Thank you."

And the world shifts from the roof to an elevator in a room of claymores.


End file.
